Stage 1

...of winning mo back:

14 days off the beer mo, that dipso doctor male nurse couldn't even manage 14 hours. Come on mate, you've got to be proud of me for that? I'll even stop being rude to that cunt mita if you let me be No1 again. Well no, I won't really, mita is a fucking cockhead.

Excellent work with the 5lbs by the way, you're an inspiration to us all.

Made it to 41 hours without even trying, now where's that corkscrew?

Twenty-three fifty hours!!


And still no sign of Dick!!!

Chorus

Oh yes there is!

Vauxhall-Conference, currently 'resting', comedian/celeb

Has any body seen my agent?

I love panto me

My favourite bit's when they chuck all the sweeties out into the audience



I kinda missed that guy

onomatopoeia wrote:Made it to 41 hours without even trying, now where's that corkscrew?

See, the old lush's deffo not worth it mo.

Day fifteen of sobriety for your uncle crown. Come on, you know you wish to show some love to the real apple of your eye.



Immo,

17 days without a drink now dad, surely this warrants a pat on the head?

I don't know, the fuckpig is emotionally as well as physically stunted.

Made it to 4 days, cracked last night and had a wee glass, I'm on nights over Christmas anyway, does that mean drinking in the morning is allowed?

He'll bloody think drinking in the mornings is endearing when you do it. You wait young lady, my dossier grows thicker (like sev ) day by day, I'm about ready to spill the beans and win him back.

Licker I don't know what you are on about

That's alright, have got aaaaages to spin this out for.

It's like the spin cycle, it's never long enough

He is SO your bitch these days, Ono

And he's still behind on points. About 2,000 points, to be precise.

onomatopoeia wrote:It's like the spin cycle, it's never long enough

Whats a spin cycle, some sort of new fangled bike?

Probably some kind of menstrual thing, Jimmy. Best not to ask.

supermo wrote:He is SO your bitch these days, Ono

And he's still behind on points. About 2,000 points, to be precise.

"Ever get the feeling you've been cheated?" That's all I'm saying mo.


Anyway, 21 days without a drink, you've got to be proud of me a little bit. A paternal handshake perhaps?

22 days sober you baldy cunt, I want your love. Was that a George Michael song? Ooooooh, I know, it was Transvision Vamp:



Haw Tracey, you're about as sexy as boxing.


NB: Tracey James was the lead singer of Transvision Vamp.

It won't last. And it probably hasn't been 21 days anyway.

supermo wrote:It won't last. And it probably hasn't been 21 days anyway.

My prediction is that it will go all wrong on Christmas Eve, I'm giving my liver some time off in preparation as well though ...... only the five days of course

Day 24.